After i told myself to go for it or to charge, my inner self problem starts again - indecisiveness. How can a person can be so indecisive. This bad quality of mine make me so miserable and down most of the time. I have no mood in doing anything and the work keeps piling up. I wanted to steady myself but the one inside me make me so uncertain and so tired.... really longing for a simple life with my family members though I have to do all the house chores...

I went for my first oncall yesterday. Quite a peaceful day in the A&E so have a nice day but ended up being given advices by one of the doctor in charge but I am really glad he told me that so that I can set my goal clearer... Today is another day which I woke up very early in the morning to go for round and after that I went back to my room to study. Only a little of things got into my brain and the rest obstructed by the anxiety in me... Then went to the clinic, have a nice experience there although it is really packed with students but I did gain something...

Now back in my room, wanna get some entertainment to make me laugh so that I can start to read and absorb the facts better and happier... Wish me luck!!!