I'm like that. I always agree to something without much thinking. I don't know how to say 'NO'. After that, I'll be regretting why I agree to that at first. This makes my life so miserable because my heart don't want to do it but in term of responsibilities, I need to perform it. Just hate this kind of feeling but what to do, life does not come easily. How I wish I can say 'NO' for sometime.
I talked to mom for a long time just now. She again recalled some of the unhappy memories. I found out that there were many common happenings in our life. We were so alike. I really hope that she can relax and enjoy more and my bros can help her out more...
Friday, January 30, 2009
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Happy Chinese New Year !!!
Today is the 3rd day of CNY. I'm staying at home and not going out for visiting because feeling quite a lazy and just wanted to hang around the house & helping out with the house chores. This year I don't have the mood to go out visiting with friends like my little bro who is going out with his friends and now there are just outside talking and laughing loudly in the living room and I'm here in the TV room writing my blog.
The CNY this year without some of friends like Stephanie, Hung Ai feels like not as fun as before. Hope we can go visiting again just like before in the future.
Like see, what had I done for the past few days :
On the eve of CNY, I helped mom to prepare the dinner. We had fake 'shark fin', sea cucumber mixed with mushroom, 'char sao rou', duck, fish, chicken soup with abalone, 'sui mai' and 'ngo hiang' made by mom. Nice dinner and very full. At night, do some last time cleaning before the CNY. The fireworks started 5 minutes before midnight just like the years before although this year is a wet new year. Skype with my sis as she wanted to 'sou shui'. Really wish she is here with her but what to do, she still need to study as there is no holidays in Japan.
1st day of CNY, I woke up late as I also 'sou shui' and mom cooked longevity noodles for me. I greeted my parents and got my red packets from them. We filled the containers with food and watched some CNY programs. Later, my NZ uncle(2nd) and cousins (Peggy & Amy) came over our place for lunch and my 3rd uncle & family visited us at the same time. Our house suddenly packed with people and never expected as for the past few years, usually not much relatives came on the 1st day. Later, followed by my cousin (Ah Yong) and his friends also visited our place. Quite busy but still ok. Not much stuff can be talked about. We together with NZ uncle visited my auntie (Sibu ah yi) and had a good talk. After bringing my NZ uncle and cousins back to Kingwood hotel, we went to other relatives house and came back home in the evening. We had our dinner and watched TV till late at night.
2nd day of CNY, I woke up late again. We visited 2 more relatives houses and my Sibu auntie & her daughters came over to our place. I talked with my niece Ee See and still can't really talk with her father, my cousin-in-law. We went to sister Ah Chin's new house. Very nice and beautiful. Not expensive but the surrounding not really develop yet.
3 days had passed and I'm still enjoying my holidays. I haven't start reading any of the materials/lecture notes that I brought back as I missed some classes when I went to Sabah. Oh ya, my relatives like the food that I brought back from Sabah. :-)
I hope that I'll start doing my report today if not tml. :-P
The CNY this year without some of friends like Stephanie, Hung Ai feels like not as fun as before. Hope we can go visiting again just like before in the future.
Like see, what had I done for the past few days :
On the eve of CNY, I helped mom to prepare the dinner. We had fake 'shark fin', sea cucumber mixed with mushroom, 'char sao rou', duck, fish, chicken soup with abalone, 'sui mai' and 'ngo hiang' made by mom. Nice dinner and very full. At night, do some last time cleaning before the CNY. The fireworks started 5 minutes before midnight just like the years before although this year is a wet new year. Skype with my sis as she wanted to 'sou shui'. Really wish she is here with her but what to do, she still need to study as there is no holidays in Japan.
1st day of CNY, I woke up late as I also 'sou shui' and mom cooked longevity noodles for me. I greeted my parents and got my red packets from them. We filled the containers with food and watched some CNY programs. Later, my NZ uncle(2nd) and cousins (Peggy & Amy) came over our place for lunch and my 3rd uncle & family visited us at the same time. Our house suddenly packed with people and never expected as for the past few years, usually not much relatives came on the 1st day. Later, followed by my cousin (Ah Yong) and his friends also visited our place. Quite busy but still ok. Not much stuff can be talked about. We together with NZ uncle visited my auntie (Sibu ah yi) and had a good talk. After bringing my NZ uncle and cousins back to Kingwood hotel, we went to other relatives house and came back home in the evening. We had our dinner and watched TV till late at night.
2nd day of CNY, I woke up late again. We visited 2 more relatives houses and my Sibu auntie & her daughters came over to our place. I talked with my niece Ee See and still can't really talk with her father, my cousin-in-law. We went to sister Ah Chin's new house. Very nice and beautiful. Not expensive but the surrounding not really develop yet.
3 days had passed and I'm still enjoying my holidays. I haven't start reading any of the materials/lecture notes that I brought back as I missed some classes when I went to Sabah. Oh ya, my relatives like the food that I brought back from Sabah. :-)
I hope that I'll start doing my report today if not tml. :-P
Sabah Trip
Overall the trip was fine. There were 3 of us going (all girls' trip) There was a mix of feelings during the trip.
Anger & fustrated
1. missed communication among friends made the trip started with low mood
2. one's adventurous and keen to look around made some of the group mates hard to follow along
3. advices and warnings hard to get through the head of a person made other group mates not feeling good and happy
Results : snatch theft took his advantage
Happy & Fun
1. my niece was in the same group with me
2. got to go around
4. got to see and attend what a conference
Sad
1. cannot eat any special, local food
2. cannot go to any of the Sabah islands
3. cannot go to the Kinabalu park
Aim
1. climb the Kinabalu mountain
for the photos of my trip, pls refer 2 my facebook cos' i don't noe how to post the photo here :-)
Anger & fustrated
1. missed communication among friends made the trip started with low mood
2. one's adventurous and keen to look around made some of the group mates hard to follow along
3. advices and warnings hard to get through the head of a person made other group mates not feeling good and happy
Results : snatch theft took his advantage
Happy & Fun
1. my niece was in the same group with me
2. got to go around
- kota kinabalu( nice and more develop city than sibu, nice people but hard to differentiate them from malays and the local kadazans and also phillipinos)
- Phillipinos' market (nice stuff and also cheap-my Indian friend good in bargaining)
- penampang (small town - like kampung, people are very nice and friendly made the health promotion program a great success although I didn't do much of the screening work but I do the talk with my friend, kids there also very cooperative)
- UMS (very nice place but the sad thing they don't have their own faculty and hospital, meet up with Jenny Teo - still the same very good in talking)
- Hospital Likas(very beautiful and nice hospital - especially for women, mother and children hospital)
- kundasang(very cold, beautiful scenery-mount kinabalu- and still very cold)
- Poring Hotspring and Resort( jungle trekking and canopy walk but the hotspring - a disappointment)
4. got to see and attend what a conference
Sad
1. cannot eat any special, local food
2. cannot go to any of the Sabah islands
3. cannot go to the Kinabalu park
Aim
1. climb the Kinabalu mountain
for the photos of my trip, pls refer 2 my facebook cos' i don't noe how to post the photo here :-)
Monday, January 12, 2009
BIRTHDAY & Others
For my 22nd birthday, my friends and I had dinner at BBQ Plaza at Berjaya Times Square, sort of like BBQ House back in Sibu, where i come from. Then we separated, shopping and me reading at Borders. Later we went back by taxi and taxi driver who was a Kedahan Chinese was so funny that we laughed most of the time on the way back. I had a nice time.
At 12am, my friends gave me a surprise birthday celebration in my room. That recorded sth funny to trick me and bought a green tea cake for me. I also got a new pink, leather wallet. I oledi predicted that because I asked for it before. We talked and laughed thro' the night. Some of them even learn makeup in my room till morning 5 am... I already slept.
On Sunday, which is the actual day of my birthday, I got a bracelet from my co-buddy, Wei Ying. A nice one. I went for my CFCS visit at Kajang. Everything went very well. Go for some shopping at Mid Valley and at night, went for dinner at BBQ Chicken at Jaya One with my friends. They chicken there very nice.. Price ok, ok
I had nice birthday. But upon that, I'm sad because one of my coursemate was in the hospital for her foolish action which will take her life away. She suffered so much and was so sad. I don't understand why can't she find some of her coursemates to talk to and maybe things are just not that bad... Haih I really hope she will be alright.
I'll be going to Sabah on Wednesday for a conference. I just found out that, Ee See is also going and so coincidence, we are in the same group... Very happy can have someone familiar... I'm looking forward for the trip but at the same time a bit worry about our presentation there during the conference and missing so many classes.... Wanted to get something nice, needed to sacrifice something nice too... Just don't like the feeling....
Before I end, I wish everyone good health and happy always...
At 12am, my friends gave me a surprise birthday celebration in my room. That recorded sth funny to trick me and bought a green tea cake for me. I also got a new pink, leather wallet. I oledi predicted that because I asked for it before. We talked and laughed thro' the night. Some of them even learn makeup in my room till morning 5 am... I already slept.
On Sunday, which is the actual day of my birthday, I got a bracelet from my co-buddy, Wei Ying. A nice one. I went for my CFCS visit at Kajang. Everything went very well. Go for some shopping at Mid Valley and at night, went for dinner at BBQ Chicken at Jaya One with my friends. They chicken there very nice.. Price ok, ok
I had nice birthday. But upon that, I'm sad because one of my coursemate was in the hospital for her foolish action which will take her life away. She suffered so much and was so sad. I don't understand why can't she find some of her coursemates to talk to and maybe things are just not that bad... Haih I really hope she will be alright.
I'll be going to Sabah on Wednesday for a conference. I just found out that, Ee See is also going and so coincidence, we are in the same group... Very happy can have someone familiar... I'm looking forward for the trip but at the same time a bit worry about our presentation there during the conference and missing so many classes.... Wanted to get something nice, needed to sacrifice something nice too... Just don't like the feeling....
Before I end, I wish everyone good health and happy always...
Thursday, January 8, 2009
TIRING...
maybe i'm not strong enough and intelligent enough to face all the problems. Maybe i'm only suitable to be an unknown and ordinary person. i really hope all these things are not happening and i can turn back the time to remake my decision. but i think that's impossible and i can only continue to walk forward and try to lessen and lessen the burden on me as well as as beneficial to me...
Saturday, January 3, 2009
today is my sis's birthday. i messaged her but it failed to deliver. Quite worry but i think she will be fine. I sent her an ecard hope she likes it. I had my breakfast with hung ai tis morning and we ate at Aloha, laksa later we talked at my house. It was nice to a small talk with her like that. Hope we can do this more often.
A little bit worried today, tachycardia most of the time. Prob i haven't finish reading my lecture notes and I'll be going back to KL on Mon. Very worry cannot catch up but I finally realized that even though i rushed like that, nothing much can get into my mind, might as well I enjoy myself in these remaining 2 days of holidays in Sibu before going back to KL to work hard again...
A little bit worried today, tachycardia most of the time. Prob i haven't finish reading my lecture notes and I'll be going back to KL on Mon. Very worry cannot catch up but I finally realized that even though i rushed like that, nothing much can get into my mind, might as well I enjoy myself in these remaining 2 days of holidays in Sibu before going back to KL to work hard again...
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